really do wish everyone finds peace within themselves
Peace starts when we accept ourselves, but it’s also about taking action into our lives. If we get stuck in our ways, we stop ourselves from evolving. We must play a part in our own path to happiness. We often look for it on the outside, but comes from within.
Sometimes it is your fault.. Sometimes you don’t listen well enough, you’re selfish, you’re rude and you aren’t always right. Sometimes you fucked it up and tbh that’s okay. It happens, learn from it, apologize and keep it moving. Just because you fucked up doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Don’t dwell on it
(7/7) “Sometimes I want to throw my shades away. I want to throw this stick away, and stand up, and walk straight. Listen to the traffic and just walk straight forever. It’s like I’m in a dream. A dream where I’m not blind no more. I’m still the old K. Sometimes I’ll sit still for three hours, breaking down what happened that day. All the shit I did wrong. Everything I could have done different, to make it not happen. But it did happen. No matter how much I push it back, by drinking, or binge watching a show, it happened. That day happened. And I’m not dealing with it. I’m not handling it. I’m in purgatory, limbo, the in-between. I’m not in a braille class. I’m not signing up for programs. There’s a program where they teach you how to walk and stuff. I’m not even going to that. It’s been almost two years, and I’m still on step one. Cause step one means saying I’m not gonna see no more. Step one is I’m blind. That’s step one. And I haven’t felt ready. Cause step two is a whole new life. But it’s time to start walking. Benji and I have been praying so much. We watch her church on YouTube, and there’s a part at the end where you can get saved. I say that prayer every week. Benji laughs at me. She says: ‘You get saved every week.’ But I’ve gotta say the prayer. I’ve been praying so much, but it’s time for me to move. Maybe one day some doctor will figure out some surgery, OK. But I can’t wait for that. I’ve got to get off these steps. Cause if I’m not moving, that means I died on that day. I died on January 14th. I died at 33. And there has to be more. I want to see more than this. I don’t even know what I want to see, but something more than this. The world, life. I want to see life. I know I seen some, but I didn’t see a lot. I can see it better. So I gotta walk. When I leave off these steps, ain’t no telling what’s gonna happen. That means I’m off of ‘Go.’ I can fall. I can drop. But I’m gonna walk. Not using my eyes. I’m gonna walk in faith. There’s somebody leading me. I feel that now, I really do. I’m here for a reason. I’m scared. It’s scary as shit. But I’m gonna do it. Even if I’m scared, I’m gonna do it. I’m getting off these steps. I’m gonna walk.”
Kasson has a lot to overcome, internally and externally. It would be great if he had some solid ground beneath his feet from which to fight that battle. If you’ve been moved by his story, please consider contributing to his GoFundMe here: https://bit.ly/kasson
If you know of any resources that might benefit Kasson, medical or otherwise, please reach out to Benji at melissatjbenjamin@gmail.com
